• Dr. Matt Zakreski

When COVID hit our household

On Tuesday I tested positive for covid.

I haven't been perfect during the 2+ years of quarantine, but I've been pretty darn safe. I've said no to a lot of things and done a lot social distancing. I still wear my mask when I go out, especially if I'm going to be inside places with a lot of people.

Except for one day last week.

We were just going inside for a little but, I thought. And when we ended up staying for longer than planned, I figured (like a lot of people have been lately), "well, they say that covid is going, what's the big deal?"

Well, I don't know if covid is going away but it is definitely still here.

I didn't feel sick right away, but when I did... Wooooooo was I ever sick. Chills, nausea, headache, coughing, dizziness, the whole thing. And I don't really get sick. And I'm a relatively healthy person in general.

While I was surprised at how intense the symptoms of covid were, I was completely unprepared for the psychological impact of finally catching this awful virus. I felt intense shame at letting down my guard, guilt at exposing loved ones, anger at the virus (without getting into the broader social and political trends that got us to the point, because ), and, yes, fear that I had a virus that has killed millions of people worldwide.

I'm feeling better(ish) today but I know that I have a long way to go. I'm confident that I will recover, largely because I've been blessed to have amazing support. But I wanted to get the word out there about my experience because I don't want anyone else to go through this unless they have to.

So a few notes:

1. Covid is still out there. Please take it seriously. 2. Continue to take precautions wherever you can. Masks. Social distancing. Hand washing. Stay outside. 3. If you get covid, ask for help. This is not something that you can handle on your own easily. And if you're like me and you have trouble asking for help, that's all the more reason to prepare. 4. And if you do get covid, remember this: you have it. You cannot change that fact. Beating yourself up for it doesn't help you or anyone else. When your thoughts drift to that place, try to redirect them back to your recovery.

That's all for now. Thanks for your support and your attention. Be safe out there.


Note. I'm speaking about something very personal to me here and this is a pro science and pro reality page. Any comments to the effect of "covid is a hoax" will be deleted and blocked. Sorry, but not sorry.

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